Psychospiritual Grief Work

Psychospiritual Grief Work via Zoom

Dr. Linda Backman, Psychologist, was drawn into the field of counseling and psychotherapy in 1978 through the premature birth and death of her second son. Initially, she found little support and guidance as she walked through her grief process. Following this experience, Linda, along with a colleague, established Kinder Mourn in Charlotte, North Carolina. Kinder Mourn is a non-profit agency devoted to counseling and education with regard to the death of children. Much personal and professional experience transpired over the following twenty years as Linda continued to gain expertise in the grieving process.

Many years later Linda found herself in another grief situation following the death of a colleague and friend. This time, the loss flung open many doors for Linda as she experienced what she felt was an awareness of the continuity of spirit or soul. Linda began reading whatever she could find in the field of reincarnation and the continuity of spirit. In addition, she sought additional training to understand her experiences surrounding the knowledge that the soul never dies.

In 1993, Dr. Linda Backman found it possible to verify continuity of consciousness through a medium. Messages from a departed loved one can be articulated through a medium. As individuals came into Linda’s psychological practice to focus on grief issues, she ascertained some of these people needed the knowledge and experience of being able to speak to their loved one. Connecting with the spirit of a loved one, for many, assists in the healing process.

Through the use of guided imagery Dr. Backman has developed a process to assist individuals in connecting and communicating with their loved one. While many find the use of a medium quite powerful, others discover being able to communicate with their loved one themself to be of even greater healing value. Such Guided Grief Work is utilized to maintain the bond or connection with a loved one who has crossed over. Assisting individuals seeking physical, psychological, and spiritual transformation is the heart of psychospiritual griefwork. This approach to grieving involves not only the healing of the loved one still in body, but also, if it is needed, the healing of the one who has crossed into the spirit world. Through channeling, the spiritual and physical/psychological realms are brought into direct contact. A comparison could be made to Gestalt theory, only in psychospiritual griefwork, the person in spirit is actively included in the healing process.

In 1975, when bereavement researcher Rees interviewed 227 widows and widowers he found nearly 50% of these individuals had visitation experiences or, what some call, after-death communication. Visual, auditory, and spoken messages were the most common means of connection. Great comfort seems to be found for the bereaved individual when he/she experiences communication with their departed loved one. One woman who has worked with Linda has said:

"Well I wasn't sure what to expect at first .. but when she said she had an image of a kid goat in a yard, that made me think it must be John. When he was a child he used to run up the mountain behind the farm catching kid goats. I think he must have been his happiest then, before the burdens of life and responsibility started to weigh on him. She also told me he had dark, bushy hair and a strong accent - that was John. It was like having a chat with him, everything she relayed to me made sense. I hadn't realized that by trying to help him in his last few years I was making him feel more of a failure. Apart from that, there were no real surprises. It was as if I knew why he left all along. The whole experience made me feel much calmer and almost happier - if there is such a state so soon after a loss like this (one year)."



I Never Held You
I Never Held You: Miscarriage, Grief, Healing and Recovery
by Ellen M. DuBois and Dr. Linda R. Backman Ed.D

I Never Held You speaks to the heart of women, their families and friends who have either lived through the pain & grief after miscarriage, or who want to better support someone who has. Author Ellen M. DuBois shares her own painful journey after miscarriage taking you from her darkest moments of grief, despair, isolation, anxiety, fear and depression to the steps she took towards healing and recovery. Her suggestions prove to be helpful in balancing the emotional peaks and valleys after suffering such a heartbreaking loss. I Never Held You validates your grief after losing a baby to miscarriage, and assures you that you're not alone in your struggle. With the help of contributing author Dr. Linda Backman, Ed.D., licensed grief counselor, psychologist and author, you'll come to better understand grief- and why it's so important to allow yourself the time necessary to heal. If you're looking for help and support after miscarriage, or want to help someone how has miscarried, this is the book for you.


I Never Held You by Ellen DuBois, a book offering advice and support to cope with miscarriage and the loss of a young child, will be published in January, 2006. Dr. Backman has written the foreword and provided commentary in this useful book for couples having suffered the physical loss of a baby.

Linda is available both in person and by phone for consultation and therapy to parents who are in grief over the loss of a child.